FROM: Eve Rickert, social chair
The EAC-BC Social Committee needs one additional member. Can you help? The time commitment is minimal: you’d tag-team with one other member to provide food for monthly branch meetings—including shopping, setting up, and cleaning up. This is an easy job and a great way to start volunteering for EAC. And you get to take leftovers home!
—Eve
FROM: Tina Robinson and Eva van Emden, professional development co-chairs
As we head into the fall, we’re looking forward to another season of great seminars. To start off, we’re offering another chance at two seminars that sold out last year: Advanced Proofreading in September 2012 and Stylistic + Structural = Substantive Editing in October 2012. We’re working on a schedule of seminars for the rest of the 2012–2013 year, which we will announce soon.
This year, we are making a couple of changes to the way we run seminars.
If you have questions or feedback about these changes, please contact us.
This sign could benefit from a liberal dose of full stops (“No appointment necessary drop in or call”) and spell-checking (“Work to-day get paid to-day”). Photo by Frank Karabotsos.
This label—from inside a T-shirt—features a common misspelling: “seperately.” And shame on those fabric “softners” for not drying promptly! Photo by Frank Karabotsos.
The contest that awards overwrought writing is back: the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest. Since 1982, the English department at San José State University has sponsored the contest, one that challenges writers to compose an opening sentence to the “worst of all possible novels.”
The entry categories for the 2012 contest were as follows: Romance, Adventure, Children’s Literature, Crime, Fantasy, Historical Fiction, Purple Prose, Science Fiction, Vile Puns, and Western.
Three Canadians were singled out for their particularly turgid efforts: Guy Foisy (Ontario), who won the Purple Prose category; Emma DeZordi (Quebec), who received a Dishonourable Mention in the Romance category; and James Macdonald (Vancouver), who received a Miscellaneous Dishonourable Mention.
The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest is the brainchild of Professor Scott Rice, who, when a graduate student, wrote a paper on Victorian novelist Lord Edward Bulwer Lytton (the Bulwer Lyttons do not hyphenate their surname but the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest does), author of the English language’s (arguably) most infamous opening sentence: “It was a dark and stormy night …”
Here’s the sentence in full bloom:
It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents—except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness.
Paul Clifford, Edward Bulwer Lytton, 1830
Years later, after having judged numerous writing contests, Professor Rice “struck upon the idea of holding a competition that would be honest and—best of all—invite brief entries.”
2012 Purple Prose: runner-up
“Corinne considered the colors (palest green, gray and lavender) and texture (downy as the finest velvet) and wondered, ‘How long have these cold cuts been in my refrigerator?’”
Linda Boatright, Omaha, NE
2012 Purple Prose: Dishonourable Mention
“The drugged parrots pelted the village like a hellish rain of feathered fanny packs stuffed with claws and porridge, rendering Claudia’s makeshift rabbit-skin umbrella more symbolic than anything else.”
Jeff Coleburn, West Chester, PA
2012 Western: runner-up
“He got down from his horse, which seemed strange to him as he had always believed that you got down from a duck or a goose.”
Terry L. Johnson, Tularosa, NM
Read all the 2012 winning entries.
For information about entering an opening paragraph of your own into next year’s contest, go to www.bulwer-lytton.com/contact.html. The submission deadline is April 15, 2013.
Editors are bookworms. Hopeless bookworms. Take this 13-question self-diagnostic test, created by hopeless—but happy—bookworm Frank Karabotsos, to determine exactly how “hopeless” your book-loving condition is.
You know how it is. You approach a bookstore and resolutely tell yourself, I’ll only go in for five minutes, buy the book I want, and make my escape. Yeah, right. When does it ever happen that way? I used to feel guilty about this, but my only worry now is, how bookish am I, really? Perhaps you’ve asked yourself the same question. Well, you’re about to find out.
If you answer Yes to more than 11 of the following statements, you’re a Bibliolater: you’d sell your house for a first edition; between 6 and 10, you’re a Bibliomaniac: you’d read a book while skydiving; between 1 and 5, you’re a Bibliophile: you probably carry reading material with you into the bath.
Only if you answer No to all of the questions are you truly safe, able to resist the temptation of books when circumstances warrant.
Take the test to find out how “hopeless” your book-loving condition is.
| DOES THIS DESCRIBE YOU? |
| You judge a book by its spine, that is, by how well it will look sandwiched between other books on your shelves. |
| You change the arrangement of the books on your shelves to give them a refreshing new look, the same way others rearrange their furniture. |
| You wince when you hear a crack after someone bends a hardback more than 180 degrees. |
| You have at least three copies of War and Peace (or another famous work) in three different translations. |
| You know the difference between bibliophily, bibliomania, and bibliolatry. |
| You have an urge to remove the dust covers from your books and display them as posters in your office. |
| You use a steam iron to smooth out the wrinkles in the satin ribbon markers of your books. |
| You purchase two copies of the same book: a paperback for reading on the beach, and a hardback for reading at home. |
| To avoid your spouse’s cry of “Not another book!” when a parcel arrives, you have your orders sent to your work address or to a sympathetic non-bookish friend (someone who won’t be tempted to open the box). |
| You have multiple copies of a favourite novel, one with a cool cover, one with illustrations, and one with scholarly notes. |
| You buy Brodart plastic covers to protect your books, just as libraries do. |
| You start reading a paperback in the store, but then order the hardback since you want a copy with nicer paper and wider margins for notes. |
| You wish you had never heard of The Folio Society. |
Now it’s your turn. What other symptoms of obsessive bookishness do you (or others you know) exhibit?
Contest sponsor: The Vancouver Writers Fest
Contest deadline: October 21, 2012
Calling all poets and short-story writers—The Vancouver Writers Fest is holding its annual poetry and short story contest. Entries are being accepted for unpublished work in two categories: poetry (up to 500 words) and creative short fiction (up to 1500 words).
Prizes will be awarded (first prize: $500; second prize: $350) for the top two entries in each category. First-place winners will be published in subTERRAIN magazine, and all winners will be published on The Vancouver Writers Fest website.
A sign of spring: cherry blossoms! Photo by John Hannah.
A sign of spring in the BC backcountry: when pet turkeys from neighbouring properties stroll over to your garden–just because they can. Photo by John Hannah.
A sign of spring: crocuses! Photo by John Hannah.
THE BOOKSHELF
Editor Joy Tataryn reviews a book of writer- and editorcentric essays by Marcia Riefer Johnston.
COPY EDITORS TAKE TO THE STREETS?
Yikes! Have stressed-out copy editors turned to violence?
WINTER WORD ART
Word Art gets into the advice business, sharing a tip on what to do if you ever find yourself buried under an avalanche.
BOOKSHELF: MORE MINI BOOK-REVIEWS
More three- to five-word book reviews of Christmas gift-worthy books.
“HARK! THE HARRIED EDITORS SING!” (LYRICS)
It’s time for West Coast Editor’s annual, editing-themed Christmas carol. This year’s panegyric to editors is sung to the tune of “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing!”
OED CROWDSOURCING REDUX
In 1859, the British and American public was called upon to crowdsource what would eventually become the Oxford English Dictionary. The call has gone out again.
Winter sky. Photo by John Hannah.
MACMILLAN STOPS PRESSES
Starting next year, Macmillan’s range of dictionaries will only be available online. Could the Oxford English Dictionary—still available in print—be far behind?
BOOKSHELF: MINI BOOK-REVIEWS
Three- to five-word book reviews of Christmas-gift-worthy books.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN! (SLIDE SHOW)
Check out this Halloween-themed slide show. Conceit: pumpkins love punctuation.
“THE HISTORY OF ENGLISH” (VIDEO)
Love history, the English language, surreal comedy, and voice-over artists with Oxford English accents? Check out this video: “The History of English in Ten Minutes.”
Autumn is here. It’s time to nap. Photo by John Hannah.
SEMICOLONS: AIDS OR AFFECTATIONS (POLL)
West Coast Editor wants to know your opinion about semicolons and their place in online writing. Are they essential aids to understanding or mere affectations?
BUYING TWITTER FOLLOWERS: A PENNY A PERSON
Psst! Have you heard? Many people, including politicians, celebrities, and reality-show hopefuls (but, we hope, not editors), are buying “large blocks of Twitter followers.”
TROUBLING TRENDLET: GROUPING BOOKS BY COLOUR
In what can only be a sign of the decline of Western Civilization, there’s “a trendlet … kicking up dust on decor sites: grouping books on the shelf according to hue.”
Photo by Cheryl Hannah.
“THE APOSTROPHE SONG” (VIDEO)
In honour of National Punctuation Day, we present “The Apostrophe Song,” a song that aims to “put the apostrophe back in its place.”
CONTEST: POETRY AND SHORT STORY
The Vancouver Writers Fest is holding a poetry and short story contest. Entries are being accepted for unpublished work in two categories: poetry and creative short fiction.
TEST: ARE YOU A HOPELESS BOOKWORM?
Editors are bookworms. Hopeless bookworms. Take this 13-question self-diagnostic test to determine exactly how “hopeless” your book-loving condition is.
OVERWROUGHT WRITING WINS PRIZE
The contest that awards overwrought writing is back: the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest. Since 1982, the English department at San José State University has sponsored the contest, one that challenges writers to compose an opening sentence to the “worst of all possible novels.”
The Storm on the Sea of Galilee, Rembrandt, 1633 (or possibly, the Bowen Island ferry).
FROM: David Harrison
Earlier this year, I attended an EAC-BC stylistic-editing seminar. I enjoyed the writing exercises, especially one requiring each of us to write a press release announcing that the next sailing of the Bowen Island ferry would be cancelled due to bad weather. We were given several styles to choose from, including that of Jane Austen and the King James Bible. I chose King James …
CHAPTER I
A message comes down from on High to the waiting hordes, &c.
AND an Herald came down from on High to the fearful crowds, assembled by the boats on the shore of the Salish Sea.
2 O ye of little faith! saith the Herald. Ye, who dwelleth in the dank wildernesses of Bowen Island, who yearn to see the nether reaches of the Salish Sea: hearken now unto the voice of those who go down to the sea in ships and occupy their business in great waters!
3 Behold, as this day dawned, there arose a great tempest, insomuch that the ships were covered with waves: and the sea captains were sore afraid.
4 But the wind abateth not.
5 The wind bloweth where it listeth, and they who prophesy about such things hear the sound thereof but cannot tell whence it cometh, nor whither it goeth.
6 It is enough, saith He: we have given up the ghost: verily, the peoples that live in the Land of Cristy shall not set forth upon the seas this day.
7 We do earnestly repent and are heartily sorry, quoth the Herald.
8 And there was weeping and gnashing of teeth.
EAC-BC chair Peter Moskos presents a $250 scholarship to editing student Meaghan McAneeley at the Langara College scholarship ceremony on June 27, 2012. Photo courtesy of Langara College.
TO: EAC-BC
FROM: Meaghan McAneeley
I am writing to express my gratitude for the scholarship you awarded me this semester at Langara College. The money helps to ease financial burdens as I near the end of my diploma. Even more than that, though, I appreciate the recognition of my hard work while studying editing and working as an editor for our class magazine. It helps me to feel confident in my abilities and supported by a community as I embark on my job search. The recognition will surely help me to express to potential employers my passion and dedication to the craft of editing. Thank you very much.
—Meaghan
